The Colorado Kid is No Haven

ck1

After watching several seasons of Haven on Netflix, I was interested to read the source material, Stephen King’s The Colorado Kid. The problem is they are not even sort-of the same story…

I like Haven. It’s a fun science-fiction show about people with mysterious powers in the small town of Haven, Maine. When the powers, what they call “the Troubles” on the show, get out of hand and start killing people, someone has to do something about it! That’s where our heroes come in: Audrey Parker is an FBI agent researching a mystery in town. She has some mystery about her. She is immune to the effects of people’s Troubles and she seems to have been in town before… sort of. Police officer Nathan Wuornos teams up with her. His Trouble? He can’t physically feel things. He doesn’t know if he’s touching a hot stove and he can’t feel it when he gets punched in the face… but he can feel Audrey! His high school friend, Duke Crocker, is the local bad boy. His Trouble is not revealed for a few seasons, so I won’t spoil it here. But I will spoil the book…

Spoilers

I thought The Colorado Kid book would be an interesting supernatural sci-fi story sort of like the show that’s supposedly based on it. Boy, was I wrong. The entire story would only be one chapter in an interesting book.

One of the things the my author Wifey first learned is “Show, don’t tell.” This entire book is telling. It’s two old newspaper men telling the story of an unsolved crime to their pretty 22-year-old intern. They go on and on for 178 pages about an unidentified man dubbed The Colorado Kid and… the crime is never solved! So, yeah, can I have those hours of my life back please? The cover of the book reads, “Would she learn the dead man’s SECRET?” No. No she doesn’t.

ck2

There is no resolution, it’s kind of boring, almost nothing happens in the present except three people sitting around talking, it’s not really well written, and Stephen King manages to insult Christianity in the afterword. I enjoy Stephen King stories for the most part, but this is just awful.

Let me give you an example of some of the awful writing. Her is a line right out of the book: “That in the winter [the wind] was sometimes a terrible sound, almost the cry of a bereft woman, was a thing she did not know, and there was no reason to tell her.” Umm… there’s no reason to tell US either Steve-o! It’s not important information, it’s not interesting information and it’s not even shared information! Why is it in there? It’s like Stephen King is so famous now that they don’t even bother to edit his books anymore.

The only similarities between the book and the show: The newspaper men are both on the show, but only as minor characters. The police chief talked about in the book, Chief Wuornos, is also a minor character on the show. But in the book he’s long dead by the time the men are telling the girl their story. “The Colorado Kid” is referenced a few times, but it’s a very different Colorado Kid.

END SPOILERS

Okay, rant over. Needless to say, I’m glad I only spent $3.75 on the thing. But it didn’t put me off the show! That’s still a lot of fun!

Have you watched Haven? Read The Colorado Kid? Did it disgust you too? Comment me!

Advertisements

Leave a reply or watch Indiana Jones 4, your choice.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s