Transformers: Age of Stink-tion – 4 (of 4)

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I don’t know for sure that that Transformers: Age of Extinction was a bad movie. I had a hard time watching it. But I’m pretty sure it had some major flaws…

I had a really hard time keeping up with the story. This could be because my Netflix kept pooping out on me, or it could be because it was just a bad story.

Nutshell plot (I think): A failing inventor finds Optimus Prime only to have the government show up to claim him. The rest of the movie is a series of chases and fights as they all… try to stop the “seed” from falling into the wrong hands… or something?

Transformers 4 is a major departure from the previous installments. No more Witwki family is the obvious omission. Now we have Marky Mark Wahlberg as the hero protecting his daughter from the evil government and robots. The daughter Tessa (Nicola Peltz) fits pretty well into the world of attractive girls that live in the Transformers universe.

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Unfortunately her character is all over the place. She’s the helpful daughter paying the bills, the parental daughter reprimanding her dad, the rebellious daughter sneaking out to see her boyfriend, the rude daughter blaming her dad for everything that’s gone wrong. Pick a character and stick with it lady!

None of the characters, human or robot, are particularly likeable. This installment in the franchise is completely lacking in humor. The one token comic sidekick is out of the movie fairly quick. The absolute worst character is Tessa’s boyfriend. He appears after apparently stalking her from a cornfield, is obnoxious to her dad and disrespects him throughout the picture.

Even the Autobots are not very likable this time. Everyone seems to hate everyone else and each character is driven by selfish motivations. I could maybe have excused the weak plotline if the characters had been worth watching.

While it was nice to see the Dinobots again, I’m not sure where they came from. I looked up and, there they were. Not speaking, not called Dinobots, and really stinkin’ big, the dinosaur Autobots are prominently featured in a major battle.

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I might give this one another try when Netflix is working again. But at 2 hours and 45 minutes, that’s a pretty big hunk of my life.

Read Wednesday’s blog about Transformers 1.
Read Thursday’s blog about Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen.
Read Friday’s blog about Transformers: Dark of the Moon.

Did this movie ruin the franchise? Was it already on life support? Comment me!

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