The ladies of my church asked me to write them a skit about time management and relationships with other women. What follows is the script that I came up with. I hope you enjoy it…
TIME FOR FRIENDS
KIM: Traditional busy mom Bible, To-do list, Cell phone
TIME: A large clock with an antagonizing attitude
KIM enters. A to-do list is posted nearby: Do laundry, Do dishes, Walk dog, Exercise, Change kitty litter, Call Kaylee, Order Kody’s present, Make dentist appointment, Buy groceries, Make dinner, Ladies Bible study, etc… KIM opens her Bible and begins reading. After a few seconds, TIME enters.
Kim: What do you want now?
Time: Just what do you think you’re doing?
Kim: I’m doing my devotional. Like I do every morning.
Time: I don’t see “Read Bible” anywhere on your list!
Kim: I try to read my Bible every day. You know that.
Time: Okay… if you think you have the time. But your laundry is not going to fold itself!
KIM holds up a finger to stop TIME. She finishes reading.
Time: So, how was the devotional?
Kim: It was good. It was about Ruth and Naomi and the importance of taking time to build relationships with other wom…
Time: (Interrupting) That’s fascinating and all, but isn’t it time you got on with your to-do list?
Kim: Well, I suppose I should.
Time: Come on, you don’t have too much of me, you know.
Kim: Where should I start?
Time: Only time will tell… And I’m telling you to do the grocery shopping before making dinner. You’re out of rosemary, and that’s my second favorite herb!
KIM receives a text. She checks her phone.
Time: Who’s interrupting you now?
Kim: It’s Jennifer. She wants to meet for coffee today.
Time: You can’t meet her today. Or perhaps you’ve already forgotten about the list?
Kim: No, I remember. But I love Jennifer. She’s so fun to hang out with.
Time: Remember last time? You met her for coffee and didn’t come home for three hours!
(Ain’t nobody got time for that.) (Optional line, if you think they’d get the reference)
Kim: Still, I think I should text and tell her I’ll meet her.
Time: Read my face: You don’t have time!
Kim: Oh, alright. (KIM types into phone as she speaks) Sorry, Jennifer. No time today.
Time: Now, about that laundry…
Kim: (Annoyed) I thought you wanted me to go shopping.
Time: Don’t get all wound up! There’s time for both.
Kim: Okay, I’ll make myself a grocery list so I don’t spend too much money.
Time: (TIME looks around) Why are you so worried about Money? He’s not here! He probably had to go change or something.
Kim: No, Money told me to be careful this month. This’ll only take a second. (KIM picks up her phone and types as she makes a list) Let’s see. Flour, eggs, rosemary…
Time: You know, while you got that phone in your hand, this would be a good time to make that dentist appointment.
Kim: Oh, yeah! I should do that. What is the dentist’s number? I think I have an email reminder. Let me see… (KIM searches phone for email)
Time: Unless you want to wait until next month. This really is a bad time for the dentist.
Kim: Maybe you’re right.
Time: I always am! Besides, the dentist isn’t exactly the time of your life!
Kim: (looks at her phone) Oh look, I got an email from Olivia.
Time: What does she want?
Kim: (Reads the email out loud) “Kim, I’m really worried. My boss keeps whispering things to people and pointing at me. A lot of people are getting laid off at work. I think I’m going to be next. What should I do?”
Time: Sounds like it’s time for her to clock out of that place.
Kim: I need to write her back. This sounds serious.
Time: It always sounds serious with Olivia. She gets so alarmed about everything! Besides, what can you do about it?
Kim: Well, nothing really, but…
Time: (Interrupting) Then, write her back later. She’ll be fine.
Kim: But if I don’t write her back right away, she’ll think I’m annoyed with her.
Time: She just doesn’t realize how busy you are!
Kim: I guess I could wait until I do a few things on my list.
Time: Now you’re talking.
Kim: (Looks at phone) Hold on, I just got another text.
Time: Oh great! I’m starting to think you know too many people.
Kim: It’s Jennifer again. She says that we can meet another day.
Time: Whew. Dodged a bullet on that one.
Kim: I do want to meet her today though. Maybe I can just let Kurt make dinner when he gets home.
Time: No way! I wait for no man!
Kim: Fine! (KIM types into phone as she talks) Thanks for understanding, we’ll definitely connect soon. Send.
Time: Atta girl. Now, let’s get that present ordered for Kody. We need to get on that while there’s still time to ship it.
Kim: Yes, yes. Let me just go onto Amazon. I think I still have it open on my phone. Gotta love the digital age, right?
Time: Hmph. Rude.
Time: Before you order that, why don’t we get the laundry started? Then it’s going while you’re doing the rest of your list.
Kim: (Puts phone down) I guess that would be good time management.
Time: That’s what I’m here for… To manage your life.
Kim: (Looks at phone) Jennifer says ‘okay.’ She’s asking if there’s a day next week that might be better.
Time: Don’t text her back yet.
Kim: Why not?
Time: She’ll just keep texting you.
Kim: But she’s my friend. I don’t mind talking to her.
Time: She doesn’t understand what it’s like to be you. You’re a busy woman.
Kim: I’m sure she’s busy too.
Time: She can’t be as busy as you! Look at that to-do list!
Kim: I suppose I could at least get the laundry going before I respond.
Time: Right. Just give it a few minutes and then you can text her back. You need to train her not to text you so often.
Kim: That seems rude.
Time: It’s not rude. You’re still talking to her. You’re just setting up a little buffer zone.
Kim: Like a waiting room for my time?
Time: Precisely. It’s all about balance. You’ve got a lot of things to do and not too much of me.
Kim: But isn’t my relationship with Jennifer important.
Time: Isn’t this list important? What happens when the dog doesn’t get a walk? You end up with a mess to clean up. That takes even more of me!
Kim: You’re right. It’s time to get to the list.
Time: Okay, what’s next? Let’s see. Oh exercise! You’d better do that before you get a shower.
Kim: Okay, I’ll go change into my workout clothes.
Time: Unless you just want to skip again. It wouldn’t be the first time would it?
Kim: I don’t skip very often!
Time: It’s fine! You don’t have to justify yourself to me. You can save that argument for when Diet gets here. You can always exercise another day.
Kim: (Looks at phone) Oh! Kaylee is calling me.
Time: Don’t answer it.
Kim: But it’s on my list!
Time: You can call her back this afternoon. Just say you were in the shower or something.
Kim: It’s my daughter! I’m answering the call! (Answers phone) Hello?
Time: (Adlib grumbling) Fine. Just ignore your manager. I’m just trying to help you out. Etc.
Kim: (Talking into phone, trying to ignore TIME) I know, I was going to call you today.
Time: (Adlibs) Come on! I don’t have forever! Well, I do! But you don’t.
Kim: (Still on phone) We’d love to have you come visit. When are you thinking?
TIME pantomimes her disappointment, trying to get KIM’S attention. TIME makes big “no” gestures. Points at the to-do list. Points at her watch. Points at her giant clock body.
Kim: (Still on phone) I think that week will work. I can’t wait to see you guys!
Time: (Adlibs) Oh great. Something else to fit in the schedule. Let’s add ‘change sheets on guest bed’ to the list.
Kim: (Still on phone) Oh no, it won’t be a problem. You know you’re always welcome home.
Time: (Adlibs) Hurry up! You’re really starting to tick me off!
Kim: (Still on phone) Okay. We’ll see you then. I love you… Okay, buhbye. (KIM hangs up)
Time: Well, that took long enough!
Kim: I don’t mind taking a few minutes to talk to my daughter!
Time: She’ll still be your daughter if you call her later!
Kim: My relationship with Kaylee is more important than any ridiculous to-do list.
Time: But you were only on the phone with her for a minute. You barely touched base with her.
Kim: Sometimes that’s all it takes. In fact… (KIM pulls out phone again)
Time: What are you doing now?
Kim: I’m texting Jennifer to tell her I will meet her today.
Time: But, what about the list? You don’t have the time!
Kim: The list will always be there. And I will get some of it done.
Time: Ok, fine. Just send her text telling her you miss her. But don’t take a whole afternoon!
Kim: I will take as much time as I need. And we’ll have so much fun, you’ll be flying around the room!
Time: You can’t!
Kim: I can!
Time: You shouldn’t!
Kim: I really should. Quality relationships with other women are hard to come by.
Time: (Adlib) It’s not a good idea! You’ve got too much to do! The list only gets bigger! There’s no time! What about the dentist?
Kim: There will always be more chores, but there is only one Jennifer, and I miss her.
Time: No! Stop! Don’t text her!
Kim: You know what. Maybe you’re right. Maybe I shouldn’t text her.
Time: I’m glad you’re finally listening to reason.
Kim: This should be an actual phone call.
Time: No! You just don’t have the time!
KIM hits the snooze button on TIME. TIME goes to sleep.
Kim: Snooze. That’s enough time management for one day. (KIM dials phone) Hello, Jennifer? As it turns out, I do have some time to kill today…
What did you think of it? Comment me!